Draft for Life
I wanted to share that these days, lately I stopped being hateful and angry and yes yes yes! Wow suddenly I started feeling depressed. I was so scared that I can feel my own pain for sooo many years and I thought anger was saving my life by blocking my other emotions. And to be honest, it saved my life back then. It was needed for me to stay sane. Yes, sad but true.
I wanted my therapist make me fall into this trap. By trap, I mean my own feelings… Yes, I know it is so sad that I saw them (secretly) as traps for all these years. Well I’m not that “perfectly” strong now and I can feel like a -not so strong- human being. First, I realized there is this mirror I saw myself crooked through it for so many years. I can say ‘for so many years’ again and again hah. Because it is unbelievable how come I believed these “stuff” that are stuffed into my head. I will learn how to be me… step by step. I am so thankful